Last night around 6:30 I received a text from Nathan asking me me how I was doing. I responded…If tomorrow is another snow day I think it will kill me. Today is another snow day…but it has not killed me…yet. Yesterday was wonderfully exhausting. I didn’t think those 2 words went together, then I became a one sick mama. I don’t like my children being away from me, but I have gotten used to being able to rest these past few months of being ill with them in school. With all 3 kiddos at home it seems someone always needs something. My plans of a relaxing movie day were swiftly thwarted. We only got through half of one movie (and it was a NEW one!?) and then they decided to play outside for a total of 5 hours. One would think that would mean rest for mama…myself included…not so much. Like clockwork every 5 minutes someone was at the door…crying from a collision needing a kiss…asking where the sleds, shovels and snowboards are…too cold…too hot…hungry…thirsty…needing a new hat or gloves…but not for a minute wanting to come in of course. If my husband knew how much the door was open letting the heat out yesterday he would have a heart attack…but they were having SO much fun out there! Shhh…don’t tell!
Sometimes I just wish I did this parenting thing better. I wish I had more strength and energy. I wish I never lost my patience. I wish I could go play out in the snow with them or stand long enough to bake chocolate chip cookies like other moms are doing today. I wish my children didn’t have to have a sick mama. This is so.hard! While it is hard and exhausting, it is wonderful because I am so blessed to even be a mama and be able to be home with my children whenever they need me. I don’t do this perfectly, but today I am thankful that I am here and there is nowhere else I need, or would want to be. I am thankful to get snuggles and cuddles and make cinnamon french toast and hear them playing together using their imaginations and getting along. I am thankful that while the snow is (still) falling we have a warm home where our children feel loved and cared for and safe. I am grateful that they are so forgiving when I mess up or can’t hack it…and that God’s amazing grace more than covers and makes up for my mistakes and shortcomings. I am thankful that even though this time goes way too fast for me…for now they get to be little…and I get to enjoy every wonderfully exhausting minute.