Have you ever been completely scorched by the sun? A few weeks ago Jackson- now 16(!?), driving, working and playing hard- was utterly blistered by the sun. What started out an overcast day quickly turned sunny while he was busy cleaning a boat. Reflections of the rays bouncing off the vessel and the beautiful Michigan water over time (and forgotten SPF) left him hurtin’ for certain. We started the process of layering aloe vera and lidocaine relief spray but needless to say the poor kid was in a ton of pain for days. It got me thinking…the process of healing is hard!

I feel like I’ve lost a decade!? In the busyness of raising up babies that are now all taller than I am (shocking) we found ourselves with 2 graduations this spring- Emalynn from College and Maxwell from High School. This past weekend we experienced the blessing of Max being baptized on Father’s Day. For me personally in the craziness of preparation to celebrate these huge life moments God asked me personally to step back, reflect and heal. But what does that mean?

Being sick for 23 years and a difficult summer last year including 2 hospital visits in 4 days followed by no answers and lots of ‘no’s’ from the insurance company for higher levels of care left me feeling pretty defeated. I felt like Western medicine had failed me. But God brought a holistic healing program from a doctor out of Park City, Utah and by September I was focusing on detoxing my body from the cellular level. Thankfully the program is virtual but as promised from the first meeting it is not easy, it is not quick, and it is not ‘cheap’. The cost of being sick is high, and not just financially, but so if the cost of healing. I have had to step back from our business and do really hard things.

I reached a point on this long journey where I had to decide, am I willing to acknowledge the cost of what it means to heal? Just a few weeks after making this decision in a twist of irony Max broke his leg in a season-ending football injury in his senior year. Like the pain of scorched, tight skin or a broken bone, the process of healing is uncomfortable. Just like when a burn or a fracture, healing hurts- it’s stiff and sore, it pulls and tears and constricts. It takes time and requires rest to be fully restored. With severe sunburns even after the itching and shedding, sometimes the skin is never the same. Sunspots, freckles and even greater sun damage can result from even minor burns let alone the severe. Healing isn’t just physical…it’s emotional, mental and spiritual. As Max shared in his testimony on Sunday, his injury caused him impatience and frustration which I all too often feel. In this process I have had to restrict certain foods and add others being conscious of what to put in my body. I’ve had to stretch outside my comfort zone to see specialists and have procedures including an oral surgery next week to remove trapped toxins. Taking supplements on certain days and at certain times and changing how I interact with technology and EMF’s while adding things like red light therapy and highly specialized chiropractic adjustments have been a continued challenge. Many days I wonder and I’m often asked….is it helping?

The short answer is yes. Even if I don’t feel it, yes. I know that doing all of these things is helping. I still have pain everyday. I’m still exhausted after sleeping all night. It’s a process…and I trust it. Just like I trust the One who brought me to it. Would I have chosen this path of sickness? Absolutely not. But I am so grateful to be on it. God has shown me so much of Who He is because I need Him. Just like Max shared on Sunday, God uses the good and the bad to draw us to Himself. Before sickness, I didn’t know what it meant to depend of God just to survive. He loves me too much to leave me that way-thinking ‘I got this’. Yeah, I don’t. Will God heal me completely? He may! But even if He doesn’t, He is my hope-not the healing. I just need to do what He asks of me…do my part this side of heaven.

I don’t know if or what you need healing from- but we all need it at some point. We live in a broken world, and we’re broken too. Sometimes it’s from something sudden like a burn or a break. Sometimes we need healing from years of something suppressed, a suffered loss or something we aren’t even conscious of. While healing isn’t easy, when it’s time and we make the decision and say yes, it’s half the battle. If we say yes, God will be faithful to orchestrate the way to Himself, and its He Who does the repairing. We won’t be the same after – but that’s the point. So here’s to healing on this journey friends, uncomfortable and painful and worth it.

For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. Jeremiah 29:11-13