One beautiful evening in late August I was driving home after a meeting. We were on the brink of fall ministries starting up along with school, sports, a regular work schedule and a 5:30 alarm clock each morning. Just thinking about that, not to mention the late hour, made me tired. Though I have come a long way in that department, I am not much of a morning person. On my long trek home I was approaching the corner of 13 Mile Road and Pine Island Drive with much on my mind, my to-do list, and my calendar. I found myself amazed that first of all there were no cars anywhere in sight, and then I looked up and saw the sky illuminated with gorgeous, gleaming stars. I stopped the car, put it in park and literally stuck my head out the window and looked up awed at God’s masterpiece. Then I heard this song start to play on the radio and said aloud…No.Way!
I was giddy singing at the top of my lungs all the way home with the windows down and the cool summer breeze blowing across the corn fields. I felt as though God was telling my heart that this year was going to be different, but I didn’t know why. I couldn’t see what what in front of me but I did know that God was going to lead me through it. Little did I know just a few weeks into the semester I would be down & out. I’ve thought about that night often and realized God was preparing me for this great unknown.
Yesterday immediately following my post my doctor’s office called with...wait for it…a DIAGNOSIS! Finally! What I am experiencing has a NAME! It’s REAL! I have a rare condition called Median Arcurate Ligament Syndrome. In English this means that a ligament is constructing blood flow to my celiac artery. It is very painful and symptoms usually get better with surgery. Now most people probably wouldn’t be happy to find out they have to have surgery, but I was elated. God has answered SO many prayers and after nearly 8 weeks of no seeming progress and continued pain I’m ready…cut me open…fix it! Let’s do this thing!
Easier said than done. My consultation for surgery is exactly 28 days from today. That’s the consultation. Not the surgery. December 9…as in one month from now…just to be seen by the surgeon. I really expected in my mind to be recovering by then and getting ready for Christmas. How discouraging! But then I remembered that night, and that song…sometimes the night was beautiful...O God You are my God…and I will ever praise You…I will seek You in the morning and I will learn to walk in Your ways, and step by step You’ll lead me…and I will follow You all of my days.
I have to trust. I can’t quit now. I can’t see the reason for the wait but there has to be one. Even when it feels like I am taking one step forward and two steps back, today I am thankful that I can be sure that each day is a step toward where God is taking me…and I can be sure that my destination is Him.