Opposites Attract

My husband asked me first thing this morning What did you do 10 years ago today?  I had to think…okay 2 days before our wedding…I…got a pedicure…dropped a ton of stuff off to the reception hall…ran a bunch of other errands and…then my husband then asked me…Well…weren’t you dreaming about me in all of that?  I had to be honest.  This type A perfectionist task master extraordinaire was thinking about all the to do’s and don’t forgets and re-checking my checklists and making phone calls and running here there and everywhere.  Well…I was dreaming about you! he said.  Opposites attract!

I can remember the day of our wedding how cool, calm and collected my husband was.  The night before he had stayed out late with his dad (his best man) and his cousin at the B.O.B. where our rehearsal dinner was while my dad made me go to bed at like 9:30.  I of course couldn’t sleep and found myself in my mom’s jacuzzi tub at 5 the next morning with my “Day of” checklist.  My husband-to-be however…he slept until nearly noon that day!  NOON!  (These days my husband can’t sleep past 7…much has changed 10 years and 3 babies later!) His dad woke him up and he was just happy and excited to be marrying the most beautiful woman in the world.  Not the least bit anxious or stressed.  We had to be at the church at noon…DRESSED for photos!  He mosied on into the church (late!) cool as a cucumber in his jeans, t-shirt and tennis shoes and I was completely ready…hair done, dress on, makeup perfect, vail and all and I expected to walk out and see him in his tux.  I about blew a gasket and the first thing I said to him…his bride to be…was Why aren’t you ready!?  (Can you say Bridezilla!) He of course had to stop me and talk to me and take a moment to tell me how beautiful I was and how he was so excited to marry me that day and make me his wife and blah, blah, blah.  Yeah, yeah, yeah…GET DRESSED!  

I totally needed an attitude adjustment to remember exactly what that day was all about.  Here I was…his bride…the first time he saw me…hollering at him to get dressed when all he wanted was a few minutes alone with me.  It reminds me of that verse…like a gold ring in a pig’s snout is a beautiful woman who shows no discretion (Proverbs 11:22).  That special day was about two people coming together as one to create a holy union…a vow before God.  It wasn’t merely a wedding…it was the 1st day of our marriage…only the beginning of the rest of our lives together.  It wasn’t a production, it wasn’t something that had to go off without a hitch, and it wasn’t about all of those people who were coming.  It was about us and the Lord…we didn’t have to please anyone else but Him and enjoy every second with one another.  I was all wrapped up in worry and stress and anxiety…what if something goes wrong?…what if everything isn’t perfect?…things that are not from the Lord.  My husband was wrapped up…and still is…in what is from the Lord.  That is a lesson I’ve had to learn over and over and over again.   And needless to say that 3rd day of November in 2001 was absolutely, positively 65 degrees and sunny and perfect…minus the gold ring in the pig snout attitude!  (After reading yesterday and today’s post you’re probably wondering why this wonderful man still lives with me day in and day out!  I often wonder the same thing!)

Nathan always says that I’m “his rib”.  You know…how God took Adam’s rib to create Eve.  He is just certain that I am the woman God created for him.  We couldn’t be more different.  Funny how a pretty little legalist ends up with a rules-are-made-to-be-broken kind of guy.  He is affectionate and sentimental and I’m just really not.  He’s laid back and low-key and I’m not and he is just brilliant and well…me…not so much!  I guess we balance each other out.

For all the ways that we are different something that is so astonishing is that we just fit together.  He’s well over 6′ 4″ ft tall and I’m 5’1″.  Even with my tallest heels on he’s still almost a foot taller than me.  Yet…we still just fit.  For all the ways I need to relax, he makes up for it.  For all of the ways he needs to be more on-task (in my opinion of coure) I make up for it.  But what I love most is that just like he did on our wedding day and everyday since he lovingly and gently teaches me who I need to be more like.  I need to be more like Christ.  Someone who loves me more than he loves himself…even when I don’t deserve it.  Someone who puts my needs and my desires before his own.  Someone who never gives up…even when I want to.  Someone who won’t take no for an answer.  Someone who just won’t leave me alone…even when I sometimes want him to.  I have learned so much from my dear Nathan and while he isn’t perfect, just like our marriage isn’t, he shows me everyday Who I need to be more like.

In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus:

 Who, being in very nature God,
   did not consider equality with God something to be used to his own advantage; 
rather, he made himself nothing
   by taking the very nature of a servant,
   being made in human likeness. 
And being found in appearance as a man,
   he humbled himself
   by becoming obedient to death—
      even death on a cross!

Therefore God exalted him to the highest place
   and gave him the name that is above every name

Philippians 2:5-9

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